Knitting

Really, it't been a while since I've done this: writing.

My spirit has not been at peace since I've been at school, and I know why.

I went back home, this summer, to be renewed. To be drenched in my family's love and to be drowned into their open arms and hearts. But working with people never allows you to be saciated. I served and gave what I had regained, and every time showed up at home looking for more. I came back to school about a month ago, thinking I was saciated. But by the end of the first week, I was craving for solitude and for a love that no physical touch can provide.I was yearning for love and comfort that no words of encouragement, from friends, could supply.I needed solitude and God. I still do.

After speaking with some dear friends who help keep me accountable, and with some women I would see as a mentor per se, I realized that I needed to start spending more time with God. He is the only one who could provide me with love to love others. He was the only one that would give me peace and wisdom to go through my classes and jobs. But before I realized that He was who I needed, something interesting happened.

I knitted. Honestly, I never knitt. I tried to learn how to crochet some years ago, I failed. My fingers would tremble too much and I could never hold the yarn tight enough to make faster moves with the needle. However, a few nights ago with the help of someone else's yarn and needle I began to knitt. The intricate movement of the needle and against needle, looping thread with every swift turn of my wrist, caught my attention about a year ago. I tried creating a discipline out of knitting and instead came out with an extraordinary discipline to nap (every time I sat on my chair and began my needle work, I ended up falling asleep). I would not have thought that a year later I would've been knitting again; this time for a completely different purpose.

It cleared my mind.
Took me away from other people's problems.

Stitch,
Loop.

Stitch,
Loop.

Stitch... until I can't think about anything else but myself, and God.

Knitting brings me solitude and peace, even if it's at least for a little while.

Such a simple task, but so spiritually (not the religious kind) retributing.

So, tonight I knitted, took a shower, and continued writing this entry.

hanks Father, for Knitting.